After watching Eko’s Mac & Cheese Tasty video (and customizing with bacon and breadcrumbs, FYI), the opportunity to choose my own mac and cheese confection led me to some bigger questions. Do people actually willingly mix in broccoli? Is one variety of cheese sufficient? Stovetop or oven-baked? I took to Google for answers, and I, for one, was left with some greater existential questions.

Is mac and cheese ever supposed to be brown? What about black?

Are Cheetos an acceptable accoutrement?

Are we OK?

Is society as we know it coming to an end?

It’s hard to imagine that noodles slathered in the ultimate culinary trifecta—milk, butter, and cheese, glorious cheese—could make you cringe, but the Internet has taught me things about bad mac and cheese I never wanted to know.

I did a deep dive into the not-quite-dark web and curated the 9 worst mac and cheese attempts. If at any time, you want your sanity restored, go ahead click over to Eko’s Interactive Tasty recipe — which will not only steer you clear of a macaroni monstrosity, but also tell you what your cheese, noodle, and topping preferences say about your personality.

Read on to find out what your fork hasn’t been missing.

We aren’t crying, you’re crying. (We are actually crying).

Is this considered a crime?

Mac and cheese called, it wants its dignity back.

One word. Lol.